Tomorrow is the day!

Today was the 37th and very last time…..I put her in crib, kissed her and promised I’d be back; left the nursery with the instant drop in mood and a little sick to my stomach because I wouldn’t see her for 24 hours; I drove out of those gates without her.

Tomorrow Beehet and Gusanna will come here in the morning for about 30 minutes of paperwork. Then we pick up cakes – one for Doctor’s room and one for the caretakers in her nursery. After lunch, we’ll go to the baby house and make the rounds thanking everyone, handing out gifts, thanking Dr. Alma (head Doctor) who is just wonderful. Then finally, finally I get Maya and drive out of those iron gates for the very last time.

Elise is taking me to dinner tonight. As she says, my last night of freedom - EVER! Doubt I’ll sleep at all tonight. Excited and anxious all at once.

Count down

Baby girl is still not feeling well but trying hard to rally at the the playroom party.

Beehet told me yesterday that I can bring Maya home to the apartment on Wednesday as long as she is better. Funny. You'd think she would get better faster in the apartment away from 100+ kids passing germs around. Anyway, that is my campaign pitch.

A bit about Kazak pop culture....Driver's choice of music in the car is primarily American Rap and club music. Second runner up is Beyonce. And believe it or not some Celine Dion and George Michael. Everyone here has a cell phone and the rings are most often an American song. God knows how long it will take upon my return to get the most commonly heard song on the radio or on a cell phone out of my head - Smack That. out on the floor....smack that... gimme some more....tappin' my foot as I type.

I just came from dinner with a new Mom adopting a gorgeous baby girl, Julianna. Elise is a single woman from New Jersey. We have the immediate East Coast bond. She arrived at dinner frenzied, fast talking and animated as only East Coast people can be (God I miss that), telling me she is fed up with everyone staring at her and pointing to her head!! On her walk to the restaurant she was stopped on the street by several stern looking, older Russian women. They scolded her by pointing to her hatless head, where is your hat stupid woman!!!

As adults we learn to be polite, wait your turn, say excuse me and thank you. Not here. Survival of the fittest. What is that about? Why are they so angry? Leftover oppression? And why are they all so skinny? A genetic fight to stay alive? As Americans we haven't had to fight for anything except for the remote in a million years. Anyway, for such a rude bunch they are surprisingly soft spoken. I've learned to say the very few words I know in Russian looking down and in a whisper. So Elise has now had the ephiphany we all seem to have our first week...push, shove, scowl and mumble. How quickly I move from proud to critical huh? I am proud. I just find all of this interesting. Some would say the same of my home state, New York.

The deal about the hat is this. The belief here is that being cold causes colds. That is why the babies are bundled up so tight they look like stick figures. Nobody walks in public without being covered with hat, scarf, coat, and boats. Even the men. On the day of court Gusanna wore this cute little black skirt on her 22 year old size negative zero body, black pantyhose, and boots. Cute as a button. It was freezing and windy that day. Beehet took one look at her and in a Motherly, concerned tone told her to cover up her legs. She threw a scarf over her legs in the car. I asked Gusanna about it. She said that Beehet is worried about her fertility. What??? If she gets a cold down there she won't be able to have children. I really try to be respectful of the crazy old wives tales here but couldn't help laughing. Now, whenever she wears a skirt I shake my finger at her.....remember your fertility...

The count down has begun. I'm actually crossing out days on my calendar like a prisoner awaiting parole. Love my beautiful daughter's country but time to go home.

The Baby House

These are from yesterday. Maya was tired girl unless Darhan was around. She is sleeping on my leg. She is doing just great. What changes in just a month. From sitting only when propped up to crawling and standing strong just holding my pinkie. Rarely smiling to smiling all the time showing off her bottom teeth (8 total now, 4 up and 4 down). She is also getting more vocal. Maya is diggin' me now. Looks to be sure I'm still there. Reaches up to be held. Big smile when I walk into the nursery.

I heard her first frustrated cry - no tears, I have yet to see tears. This was after court. "Ok, we are official now. Honeymoon's over Mama. Slooooowly letting out my true colors." She is so good, I have this fear of bringing her home and devil child emerging.

These pictures are of course the playroom where

we visit with our babies for 2 hours a day.

I got there early yesterday and wanted to show

you all how cheerful and well equipped it really is.

The 3rd wall is a rack of all different size balls and 4th wall is a wall of

windows overlooking a small parking area and

large outdoor playground (one of two outdoor

playgrounds).

2 representatives from the states and from my agency, CAI were here yesterday. They are visiting the baby houses in different regions in Kazakhstan. It was funny, I felt like a proud citizen making sure they got how wonderful it is here. "You need to tell prospective families about the baby house, the Doctors, the caretakers, the grounds, the beautiful, beautiful babies, the city.......they are lucky to hear your baby is in Astana!"

We are officially a family!

Court is over and we are officially a family as of February 14. I'm so happy. Maya is happy she caught the ball. My internet connection has been down more than working lately so if you don't hear from me or I don't answer your emails assume that. But keep them coming! The support is amazing and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all of the kind emails and comments here on the blog.

Maya turned 8 months old on February 15. I got her new measurements. She is 27 1/2 inches and 18 lbs. So she grew about a half an inch and lost almost a pound. All that crawling no doubt. I'll bring Maya home to the apartment on March 1. We are in the home stretch! More to come. Better send this while I still have service.

Court has been moved up to tomorrow!

The love story continues.......

Beehet is just the best. Some background - after court begins the 15 day appeals period. Not the way we think of appeals, just another waiting period. On the 15th day, the Judge declares his/her final ruling. Beehet needs this to begin the final paperwork and to get Maya's passport. On the 16th day I can bring Maya home to the apartment. Well last week at lunch Beehet realized the end of the appeals period falls on a holiday Thursday March 1. Which means people will take off Friday as well. I'd lose 2 days. I teared up at lunch. Every day, every minute closer to bringing her home is meaningful. So Gusanna just called and Beehet was able to move court up a day so I wouldn't lose any time. Just love her for this. So court is tomorrow, Valentine's Day at 5pm.

Lunch was at our favorite place, we now go almost every day. The group is getting larger as new families arrive. The doorman knows us now. For families going over it is called Shakirasada (not the right spelling - phonetic) close to the Baby House, Driver will know it. Fabulous Kazak buffet for 500 tenge (about $4.00 right now). So over lunch I learned a new phrase. Bis ma la (again no clue how to spell) means God be with you in Arabic. Some knew of it and I guess it is in a Queen song???? Anyway, brand new to me. The caretakers say this to the babies all the time. The couple from Dallas told us. She is originally from Egypt. He is from Holland. Bis ma la, Bis ma la. Nice ring.

There are 2 english channels on my TV. The EurAsia news comes on everyday at 5pm. I thought it would be interesting to see if they report on any or what news from the States. It appears much like our Nightly News. A very professional female reporter comments on the flooding in Thailand, the business news report, a sudden increase in honor killings, the war in Iraq, and.......the death of Anna Nicole, American Playboy centerfold dies suddenly. Now don't get me wrong, I think that is just tragic, truly. But seriously!

Ok, I will report back after court. Wish me luck!

Bis ma la,

K

Mirror, mirror

This is from Saturday. The day I moved down to 4th position for the biggest smile from Maya. Beehet, Darhan, her Mother, all stepped down to the new reigning Queen, Maya herself. There is a big inflatable castle in the corner of the room against the mirror. We decided to check it out. Maya discovered the mirror and the rest of the session was spent with her cracking up at her reflection or pulling my hair.

The other 4 families went to court on Friday so lots of discussion about how it went. What questions were they asked. How was the Judge, the prosecutor, how long it took....it felt a lot like back in college searching the dorm for someone that already took the final you're about to take. The questions, the questions....The coordinators prepare us as best they can for what we may be asked. I went through a mini, mini version of this on the day I met Maya.

Before going to the Baby House that first day, we went to the Ministry of Education. It looks and feels like any government building, long hallways and sterile. We entered into a small room and were greeted by 2 women. Beehet and the 2 women started talking in Russian, seemed friendly, there was some smiling. Then Beehet motioned for me to have a seat. Gusanna stood as did the woman who would be asking the questions. The tone of the room changed and I got nervous. The questions started out pretty routine, all translated by Gusanna. Do I understand the laws of adoption in Kazakhstan, do I understand my obligation to complete post placement reports....I started to relax a bit. Next question, I look to Gusanna and she translates in the same monotone, "Do you have boyfriend?" Probably a release of tension, but I burst out laughing. Did we go from interrogation to girl talk? Four eyes glaring at me in silence. Guess not. "No, no I do not currently have a boyfriend." Next question, "What will you do if you want to marry a man that does not like your child?" Oh, that is where they were going with this. Ok, easy. "I couldn't love with a man who didn't love my child." I was tempted to add.....or my dogs. Probably not relevant. Beehet told me to expect this question in court as well. I won't laugh. From there we went to the Baby House to meet my angel love.

I just talked to my Mom. Through the computer! For free! Technology is so cool when it isn't frustrating the hell out of me.

3 days to court!

Heroin and Kisses

So Maya and Darhan have a "thing". I caught all the action -
Darhan approaches,
"I'm goin' in"....
"Oh good I think she's into it"....
"SCORE!!!"











But my girl is no fool. She's playing the field. A few minutes later, she CRAWLED from our mat over to Muras' mat. But no kissing. That would be rude, Darhan is watching.

Hate to say it but an even bigger moment than my daughter's first sloppy kiss was my internet connection being down for over 24 hours. You would think it was heroin. I am sure Beehet and Gusanna were ready to commit me to the nearest asylum. "Can we go to the cable place now?" "How 'bout now?" "Can we go now?" Thank God for their patience with the neurotic American.

The other families are going to court tomorrow, they seemed anxious. The conversation during playtime went to whether or not each of us wanted a second child and would we come back here or go to another country. All said we wanted a second child, long pause, and the now universally known look among us........the money. I said I hoped to own Maya out right by her third birthday. Danielle said a friend of hers is adopting their second from China and is naming her "Equity".

I'm learning some new Russian words like the word for what or how is "kak" How are you? "Kak dala?" After I say something, Beehet will say to Gusanna "kak?kak?" Now here's the kicker. It is pronounced "cock". "Cock? Cock?" I asked Gusanna if she knew what that word means in English. She blushed. Guess she does.

We had lunch at yet another great Kazak restaurant. Love the Borscht! We talked about the culture some more. The predominant religion is Muslim. Beehet and Gusanna are Muslim. A small percentage are Russian Orthadox and believe it or not, Catholic. Beehet told me that they do not eat Pork. Pork is to them as Horse is to me. Beehet smiled and told me Maya is never allowed to eat pork. Well I can promise she won't eat horse.

Tomorrow everyone will be at court but we have a new family to play with. A nice couple from Dallas are adopting a pretty little girl - Alyssa. I think Maya will be disappointed that there won't be any boys to tease.

Court Date is set!

A week from Thursday, on February 15th at 10am. Maya turns 8 months old on the 15th. Good omen. This is her Doctor. So nice, Maya seems to really like her. Aunt Christy gave her that onesie. Isn't it cute? Can't see the pink pants too well but they have a ruffled hem. Just love dressing her. Such fun. Wait til you see tomorrow's outfit! Don't know if I'll sleep, I'm so excited.

Court Application Day!

Day 15. Official Bonding period is over. Beehet will take the court application over this afternoon. I should know what my date is by tomorrow, likely sometime next week. On Saturday Pam, Zach, Gusanna, and I went to the Eurasia (no idea if I am spelling that correctly) mall. It is a massive indoor mall with 3 levels. Most of the shops are little - maybe 20x20. On the bottom floor is a huge market. Similar to our farmers markets. Wouldn't you know it as you walk down the ramp to that market the first row you hit is the meat. Hanging dead meat. Can't escape the meat. JEZ...

The opposite direction has all of the produce vendors and bakeries. Did I mention that everything here is organic? The produce are absolutely delicious. They just go bad quickly without all of those pesticides. Pam is into cookies and they are yummy. Then there is the bread...oh I just looooovvvvve the bread. The 2 upper levels are store upon store of either kids clothes or furs with some furniture and jewlery mixed in every now and then. Great prices. Pam and I both bought a bunch of baby clothes. So cute! A sign of being a real Mother, I didn't buy anything for myself. Zach was a dream. He sat in his stroller and checked everyone out and played with his toy. Couldn't have been better. Funny - everyone kept staring at Pam and Zach - as if to say, "tsk, tsk look at the American taking yet ANOTHER one of OUR children." But interesting that with Zach, people actually did the unheard of! They moved out of the way, held doors open, didn't just charge past her. Amazing! We also had lunch at the mall. The Kazak beer is sooooo good and cheap! $2-$3!

Oh, speaking of Pam and Zach.....so about a week ago at the baby house I walked in on something I found horrific. In the room where the babies eat and play, there is a large playpen with wooden spindles. The inside perimeter is lined with little plastic toilets. Maya and the other children are sitting on the potties and tied to the spindles with some cloth. Now I had heard about this but thought in such a Metropolitan city, surely they wouldn't do it here! Well it took everything I had not to go take her out of there. The kids didn't seem unhappy and it is all they know. Besides it would be disrespectful to show my horror. I haven't seen it since, thankfully. So here is where Pam and Zach enter the story. On the first day they are here, Pam is unpacking and I am liking her more and more. She is funny and easy going. She has a great haircut - short (like McBane's for those who know her) but long in the front and spikey on top. Really very cool. Her style is, to use her word, - kicky. So all of a sudden out comes this little plastic potty!! I couldn't believe it! She says, "Isn't this great? I'm so happy I found one!" All smiles. I tell her, "I CANNOT believe you bought that! How awful!" She tells me Zach was always laughing and having a great time whenever she saw him on it. I guess in a way it makes sense - men love being on the toilet. Anyway, she puts it on the floor and brings Zach over to the hot pink, no less, potty. Places him on it and ties him with her leopard print scarf. He screams bloody murder. Hot pink potty was left behind.

On Sunday, Pam and Zach took off for Almaty for the final formalities before going home to Schaumberg (outside of Chicago). It was great having them here. I'll miss them.

I went to the morning session today instead of my normal schedule of going in the afternoon. There are 4 families in that session. All about a week ahead of me. 2 couples from Boston, a single woman from San Diego, and another single woman from Washington D.C. I was told today there is another single woman coming on Thursday from New Jersey. They are all so nice and most are about my age. I'll have lunch with them tomorrow. A 5th family arrived today from Dallas. The room is packed with babies all about the same age. Maya of course is fascinated with all of the new people and has to check everyone out - preferably upside down. What is with the upside down? I talked with Maya's Dr today after her check up. I really like her Dr. She smiles a lot and is caring. She says Maya still has a cold but ear infection is cleared up.

On Saturday at the morning session all 4 families were allowed to feed our babies. First time I've fed her and it was a complete disaster. Way too much going on to look at and I missed her mouth 8 out of 10 times. Then another first - poopie diaper. Maybe this post should have been labeled "All about Poop."? Anyway, the final first of the day - she fell asleep in my arms about half way through playing. Today, as you can see, she did again but this was the last 10 minutes. Sweet, huh? She looks like a frog. Just love that kid.

Meat is history

So hot landlord and young guy just came by and picked up the meat. Hot landlord flashed that gorgeous smile and apologized. Pam walked him out and asked, "what kind of meat was that?" "Is National treasure....horse". Anyway, its out of here.

Poor Zach is having a tough time and so is Pam. He is sick and crying any time he is put down. Just wants to be held and rocked. Poor little guy. Maya smiled when I came in today. She is feeling much better. She had lots of catching up to do - trying to crawl, cooing, watching everyone. Not much cuddling, too busy. I told her about Zach and not to do that to her Mama. Come home healthy, happy little girl.